Too Much

Sadly enough, I freely admit that I've been this drunk off my ass before (perhaps even more so on occasion!)


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Another Great Plate

This evening I noticed that one of the cars in front of me had a cool vanity plate... Looks as if this person in a fan of The Chronicals of Narnia.

All Alone

One of the things I love most about my job is simply watching how people behave... especially when they think no one is watching! This is a great video of someone who doesn't think anyone is watching them!


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Driving Mom Home

Yesterday after work, I had to pick my mom up from my aunt’s house (it’s only like 4 miles away from where I work), and take her home. So needless to say, I made an extra effort to drive more conservatively while she was in the car (she already thinks I’m the dark angel of death by the way I drive.)

So, everything goes very smoothly. Luckily, we left just before rush hour traffic started to pick up (so no road rage on my part!) The total trip from my aunt’s house to my mom’s is about 45 miles.

So, we finally hit Hutto (we’re now only about 5 miles from my mom’s house) when we finally hit traffic that is dead stopped! A damn train was passing through and decided to simply stop on the tracks over the road! We probably sat there, stopped, for about 15 minutes before the train finally decided to get back on its way.

One thing to know about Hutto is that they have ridiculously slow speed limits. The highway we were traveling went from 60 mph in Pflugerville to 35 mph in Hutto (a highway!!!) It’s REALLY hard to go 35 mph on that road… any time I go to my mom’s house alone, I go 50 mph down it… but she was in the car and I’ve seen Hutto pigs pull people over on this road, so I went 35 mph (it was so painful!)

We probably travel about a quarter of a mile down this road when all of a sudden this car cuts me off going about 75 mph down the road. My mom tells me to go ahead and go faster because she said that the cops would pull that jack ass over first. So I speed up (a lot!) I get to the point where I finally catch up to the car that passed me (we’re going about 85 mph now.)

All of a sudden, I realize that the car in front of me looks familiar… it was Kristy, my youngest sister! LMAO! My mom was SO pissed at her! I just dropped my mom off… I didn’t stay to watch the fireworks. Hell, I was just happy she wasn't bitching about my driving for a change! LOL!

The Hollies - The Air That I Breathe

If I could make a wish
I think I'd pass
Can't think of anything i need

No cigarettes, no sleep, no light, no sound
Nothing to eat, no books to read
Making love with you
Has left me peaceful, warm and tired
What more could I ask
There's nothing left, to be desired
Peace came upon me and it leaves me weak
So sleep, silent angel
Go to sleep

[Chorus:]
Sometimes
All I need is the air that I breathe
And to love you
All I need is the air that I breathe
Just to love you
All I need is the air that I breathe

Peace came upon me
And it leaves me weak
So sleep silent angel
Go to sleep.......

[Chorus]

Exhausted!

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Half Business Casual Half Commando

Damn! I wish I could get away with dressing like Patrick!

What The..?

Yeah... I don't know what the hell this is... all I know is that it freaked me out! LOL!


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Viagra Spoof

This video show three very short Viagra commercial spoofs... the first one could easily also be a hemorrhoid commercial, and the last one should be a "Got Milk" commercial!


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My Day Off

Today is a day to be remembered… got two important things done.

1. I got all my credit cards paid off! One step closer to being totally debt free! Only thing left are my student loans. It feels great not to have that over my head anymore. It’s been nearly five years since I’ve been debt free (as far as credit cards go that is.)
2. Reacquainted myself with an old friend that I haven’t had in years… Mr. Jameson! I had so much fun with him that I consumed him completely in one sitting. Haven’t had that much fun with him since I was 22 years old! He doesn’t quite hammer me the way he used to though… I just kinda got a light buzz.

The day is still young though... perhaps I can get some other crap accomplished today as well!

Golf Really Is A Jacked Up Game

This is from one of Robin Williams’ comedy specials (so you may have already seen it… if not, it’s damn funny!) It’s one of my favorite bits he does on this special and it’s dealing with the sport of golf (and why I refuse to play it!)


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Fallen

Night is wearing on me
Despair from past mistakes
Feeling alone now, bathed in sadness
Soaring down, a fall from grace

Empty feelings overtake me
How can I continue on?
A life so full of chaos
From bad choices, sin, and wrong

My heart was once so innocent
With your light shining through
I took that light for granted
Turned my back on love so true

Will you ever forgive me
Or must I pay the cost?
Does this fallen angel have such hope?
Or am I forever lost?

Not knowing where to turn
Someone has shown me the way
Are you waiting on me
To call your name today?

So on my knees I pray with fever
For forgiveness from you
Will you love me once again?
What more can I do?

Pimp My Ride

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This is one of the great benefits about getting powerful subwoofers in your car!

Who Shot JR?

This is JR, our Time Warner representative. As you can see, his left hand has a boo-boo. He injured his hand while artificially inseminating cows on his father's ranch last weekend!

This Is Just Stupid!

I’ve been accused of being a pyromaniac on many occasions (ok... my whole life), but I’ve never been this stupid… though I have lit my hand on fire several times.


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No List Right Now

Many bloggers have been posting lists on things they’d like to do in their lives, so I thought I would go ahead and jump on the bandwagon and make a list of my own. It just seems the “in” thing to be blogging about lately.

So as I’m going through things in my mind, I realize this (creating a list of things I’ll never have) isn’t something I really want to do. I think too much of my lingering depression lately has been because I have been dwelling on what I’ll never have.

It’s just safer for the time being for me to take each day as it comes… I don’t have the emotional strength to hope or wish for anything wonderful at the moment. I just feel so broken right now, and I know it’s starting to take its toll on me physically… my energy has just been zapped recently.

So anyway, no list from me! I need one of Jack Handey’s Deep Thoughts for a quick smile:
When you die, if you go somewhere where they ask you a bunch of questions about your life and what you learned and all, I think a good way to get out of it is just to say, "No speaka English."

My Keyboard Ewok

My little Ewok looks a bit confused about my jacked up number-keypad in my office at work... Matt jumbled up all the number keys, but I just left them in the order he placed them. It really messes with people's minds when they go to use it! It's great!

Ewok Grunt

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Darth Tom

I’ve said it before in previous posts, and anyone who knows me is aware of this… I really don’t like Tom Cruise! He just irritates the hell out me! That being said, I actually ran into a silly video with him in it… however, what I enjoyed was the Star Wars aspect of the video, not necessarily Tom Cruise.


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A Unique Genre Of Porn

Ron sent this to me nearly two years ago... it's just as funny today as it was when I first saw it! Ever wonder how furniture gets torn up when you're not around... and you were blaming the dog or cat!


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Where Do I Pick Up An Application?

This just proves that I've been working at the wrong place all of these years! How do I get a job at this place?


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